Wednesday, December 26, 2012

Christmas Meltdown

Yup it happened when I least wanted it to happen it happened on Christmas! I had the last meltdown of the year. The type of meltdown where you don't wanna do nothing but cry and be alone. I cried for so many reasons. I beg to God for so many things. I was angry for so many reasons. I felt selfish for being angry. I had a whole list of people to blame and then I had myself and only myself to blame. It was tough (picture a heroine addict going cold turkey) that's how the 24th and 25th were for me. I only found relief in an empty apartment where I sat in a corner and cried my eyes out (dramatic much) but that's how it happened.

The only reason I am sharing is because I don't think I was the only one in the world who felt that miserable that crummy. I am sure someone out there felt the same and had their own version of a meltdown. However with my meltdown with all my tears, I knew that tomorrow will be a new day, the world has not stopped because mine did. I also knew that tomorrow may be better or not but I had that little hope that it may. No matter how angry I am I always have a little bit of hope.

Today I woke up. I am doing what I should have done on Sunday or early Monday. I am getting pretty. I am going to put my best foot forward and just roll with the punches because that's just how I know how to do.

I hope you had a much better Christmas my thoughts and prayers to those who had a low one. Please know you are not alone in your sorrow.

Blessings to my wonderful readers. I hope I have something more cheerful to offer for the new year ;).



  1. It's funny because we've hung out a few times and if I didn't know about your situation, I would think your life is wonderful and worry free.

    You're stronger than you think Mel and it's a quality I most certainly admire. We all have moments where crying seems like the only thing we can do. I commend you on your ability to pick yourself back up though. You always seem to find reasons to smile and be positive even when everything around you seems bleak. I really hope you are reunited with you mister soon and I hope 2013 is kinder to you than 2012 was.

    PS - At least 2012 got us to finally meet and hang out!

  2. I promise ill do something special :). I'm sending you loads of positive vibes your way. I have a feeling 2013 will be a good year for you...and I'm pretty good with these hunches.
    - your loyal anonymous reader :)


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